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[中英文稿]:
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[视频简介]:
Dr. Ivan Joseph
作为怀雅逊大学的体育主任和足球校队主教练，约瑟夫教授经常被人问起他招收运动员时看重哪些特点：速度？力量？还是灵巧性？在这次演讲中，约瑟夫博士解释了什么是自信，以及为什么自信不仅对运动生涯，更对我们的生活来说至关重要。
As the Athletic Director and head coach of the Varsity Soccer team at Ryerson University, Dr. Joseph is often asked what skills he is searching for as a recruiter: is it speed? Strength? Agility? In Dr. Joseph's TEDx Talk, he explores self confidence and how it is not just the most important skill in athletics, but in our lives.
[中英文稿]:(TEDx没有官方文稿...提示:下方有巨长文稿)
In my past life as a soccer coach,
在我过去的足球教练生涯中，
once you won a national championship,
一拿到全国冠军，
everyone wants to come play for you.
大家都想来参加你的队伍。
Really not true.
其实这不是真的。
Once you paid them $ 25,000 a year in scholarships,
你得一年付给他们25000美元的奖学金，
everybody wants to come play for you.
所有人都想来你的队伍踢球。
And parents would always come to me and they'd say:
家长总是到我这里说：
"Okay, my son or my daughter wants to come play at your university,
“我的儿子（或女儿）想来你们大学踢球，
what is it that we have to do?
我们需要做什么？
You know, what are you looking for?"
你说，你看中什么特质？”
And being the Socratic professor that I am,
我总是这样苏格拉底式的回答，
I say, well, what does your son or daughter do?
好吧，你儿子（或女儿）有什么特长，
What do they do really well that we'd be interested in?
他们有什么我们感兴趣的长处？
And typically their answers are, well, they've got great vision.
通常他们会回答，“哦我小孩视力很好，
They're really good.
真的很好，
They can see the entire field.
可以看清整个球场“，
Or, my daughter is the fastest player, there's nobody that can beat her.
或者，”我女儿速度极快，没人跑得过她“，
Or, my son's got a great left-footer.
或者，”我儿子的左脚很出色，
Really great in the air and can hit every ball.
真的，他左脚百发百中”。
I'm like: "Yeah, not bad;
我会回答：“哦是的，不错；
but to be quite honest with you,
但是老实说，
those are the last things I'm looking for.
这些并不是我那么想要的。
The most important thing?
最重要的？
Self-confidence."
是自信。“
Without that skill, and I use the word skill intentionally,
没有那一项技巧，注意我故意用了”技巧“这个词，
without that skill, we are useless as a soccer player.
没有自信这项技巧，我们绝对当不了好的足球运动员。
Because when you lose sight or belief in yourself,
因为当你失去对自己的展望和信心时，
we're done for.
注定会失败。
I use the definition of self-confidence
我把自信定义为
to be the ability or the belief
相信自己可以完成任何任务的
to believe in yourself, to accomplish any task,
能力或信念，
no matter the odds, no matter the difficulty,
不管机遇如何，困难多大，
no matter the adversity.
哪怕身处逆境。
The belief that you can accomplished it, self-confidence.
相信你可以做到，这就是自信。
Some of you are saying, "Great, I don't have it. I'm so shy.
你们中一些人会说”好吧，我就是没有自信，我很害羞，
I'll never do that, bla, bla, bla."
我永远也做不到”之类的话。
And you start to drag all the way down here.
然后你就被自己的不自信拖垮了。
But, I use the word skill
但是，我用了“技能”这个词
because
因为
I believe it can be trained.
我相信，自信是可以训练的。
And I'll show you a couple of ways in which we do.
接下来让我告诉你一些训练的办法。
Hopefully I won't run out of time.
希望不会超时。
I don't use any slides
我没有用幻灯片，
because my speech always goes here, or here, or here.
因为我的演讲可能会进入这个，这个，或者这个方向，
So we'll see which way we get to.
待会就知道我们会讲到哪里了。
The easiest way to build self-confidence:
最容易建立自信的方法：
there's no magic button.
不要寄希望于一个魔法按钮。
I can't say: "Hey, this plane is going down,
我不能说：”这飞机要坠毁了，
who can fly?
谁能驾驶这飞机，
Put your hand up."
请举手。“
"I can, I'm confident!"
”我可以，我有自信！“
(Laughter)
（笑声）
Repetition, repetition, repetition.
你需要的是：反复练习，反复，再反复。
Right?
对吗？
What does Malcom Gladwell call it, the 10,000-hour rule?
就像马尔科姆•格莱德维尔提出的”一万小时“法则，
There's no magic button.
没有魔法按钮。
I recruited a goalie from Colombia, South America one year.
有一年我从南美洲的哥伦比亚招了一个守门员，
Big, tall 6'3" man.
很高大，1米90的个子。
You know, he had hands like stone.
你知道吗，他的手像石头一样滑。
I thought he was like Flipper.
我觉得他那时候就像《海豚故事》里那条叫弗里波的海豚一样，
Everytime I threw him the ball, down, onto the ground.
每次我扔球过去，他总接不住，
I was like, oh my god, we're in trouble.
我那时心想，”完了，我们有麻烦了“。
Simple solution: get to the wall,
解决办法很简单：让他面对墙，
kick a ball against the wall and catch it.
对着墙踢球，然后接住球。
kick the ball against the wall and catch it.
对着墙踢球，然后接住球。
His goal was 350 a day for eight months.
连续八个月，他每天练350个球。
He came back, his hands were calloused,
然后他回来了，手上全是老茧，
the moisture on his hands were literally gone,
他的手再也不”滑“了。
he is now playing in Europe.
现在他在欧洲踢球。
Magic? No.
这是魔法？不是。
Repetition, repetition, repetition.
反复练习，反复，再反复。
The problem is, we expect to be self-confident
关键在于，我们希望能有自信，
but we can't be unless the skill,
但是我们不可能有自信，除非
or the task we're doing,
需要的技能或者我们要完成的任务
is not novel, is not new to us.
是我们熟悉的。
We want to be in a situation
我们需要处在一个
where we have so much pressure in that
适当的压力水平下，
and what I mean, cause pressure builds diamonds,
——我们当然需要压力，压力才能产生钻石——
we want to be in a situation where
这个压力水平就是当我们觉得
"hey, I've done this a thousand times".
”哦我做这个都做了一千次了“。
I did my speech,
我准备演讲的时候
and I practiced in front of a mirror: bla, bla, bla, bla, bla, bla.
对着镜子练习，
Hey I'm sounding good.
”嗯我讲得不错“。
And then I went in front of my kids, and my wife.
然后我站在我的小孩和太太面前讲，
I said, oh gosh, I got a little nervous.
我说，哦天哪，我有一点点紧张。
Then I'd get in front of Glenn Gould,
然后我站在古尔德面前讲，
Oh my goodness, I am a little more nervous!
哦老天，我更加紧张了一点！
By the time I get to the ACG,
等到我在ACG演讲，
where 2,500 people, can't say anymore, right?
有2500个人，不会有更多人了是吧？
Twenty-five hundred people,
2500个人，
where twenty-five hundred people are there,
那里有2500个人，
I won't have a single ounce of nervousness
但我一点也不紧张
because of my ability to practice.
因为我的练习，
Right?
对吧？
Over, and over, and over, again.
练习，一次次的练习
The problem with repetition is:
问题在于，
how many of us bail after the first bit of failure?
我们中有多少人一碰到失败就放弃了？
How many of us bail after the first bit of adversity?
多少人一碰到不顺就退缩了？
Edison was on that video,
我们讲到爱迪生，
and it depends who you ask,
不同人有不同的数字，
there's anywhere from 1,000
但反正爱迪生尝试了1000到10000次
to 10,000 tries to build that light bulb.
才发明了电灯泡。
1,000 to 10,000.
1000到10000次。
J.K Rowling should be on that video.
然后是J.K.罗琳，
Do you know how many publishers she took her Harry Potter book to?
你知道她当时拿着哈利波特的手稿去找了几家出版社才成功出版？
I believe the number was 12 or 13...
我知道的数字是12或者13。
I am pretty confident but after two or three noes
我可能很自信，但是经过两三次的被拒之后
I'd be like: "damn it!".
我会说：”见鬼！“
After six or seven, I'm like: "maybe not!"
经过六七次失败，我会想：”可能成功不了？“
Definitely after nine or ten
被拒绝九次十次以后，
I'd be looking to be a soccer coach
我确定我肯定会转行去当个足球教练，
or something else besides an author.
或者做其他什么，反正再也不想当作家了。
(Laughter)
（笑声）
Right?
对吧？
I mean, twelve times somebody said no.
我的意思是，她经过了12次的被拒之后才成功。
But, practice, practice, practice, and do not accept failure.
练习，练习，再练习。不要被失败打垮。
Maybe it shouldn't be repetition,
或许”反复“这个词不妥，
maybe the answer should be persistence.
应该叫”坚持“。
Because we all repeat something but very few of us really will persist.
因为我们都能重复做一件事，但很少有人会坚持住。
So that's one way to build self-confidence.
这就是建立自信的一种办法。
Get out there.
勇敢出发，
Do what you want to do and do not accept no.
做你想做的事，不要被”不“打败。
The other one is self-talk.
另一个办法是和自己谈话，
We all have a self-talk tape that plays in our head.
我们每个人脑子里都有一套和自己谈话的录音带。
Anybody go shopping and put on a pair of pants this week?
这里有人这周出去购物然后试穿了某条裤子的吗？
If you're a woman,
如果你是个女人，
the first thing that always comes:
第一反应永远是：
"damn I look fat in these pants!."
”老天，我穿这裤子显得真肥！“
And if you're a man, it's the opposite:
如果你是男人，反应正好相反：
"Oh god, I got no muscle, I'm so flabby!"
”哦天哪，我没有肌肉，我看起来那么松松垮垮！“
Right? We all have this tape that plays in our head.
对吗？我们脑子里都有这样的录音带。
As a student, if they asked me the question,
做学生的时候，如果教授提问，
it was like: "Oh, gee please professor don't pick me, I don't know the answer."
学生会想：”哦天哪，教授千万别挑我回答，我不知道答案。“
I'd look down.
然后我就假装低头看地。
Right?
对吧？
If you're in the b...when I, let me tell you something,
让我来告诉你一件事，
and the VP of business adminis. here, I shouldn't repeat this,
我不该讲这个故事（但让我再讲一遍）
but when they hired me as an Athletics director,
当学校负责人聘我做体育部主任的时候
I sat in an architect's meeting,
我参加了一个建筑设计师的会议
and I am as dumb as a post
当我听到那些数字啦角度啦
when it comes to anything to do with numbers and angles.
我完全呆如木鸡。
And they are like:
会上是这样的：
the fundibulator valve
他们讲到这个建筑的
of the architectural, uh,
某某阀门，然后问我
what do you think doctor Joseph?
”你的意见呢，约瑟夫博士？“
Uh, let me look into that for you and get back to you.
（我回答）”呃让我想想，再联络。“
(Laughter)
（笑声）
Right?
是吧？
I was in a, oh god god, please don't ask me, please don't ask me.
我当时就在这样一个”哦老天，别问我，千万别问我“的情形下。
We all have this negative self-talk that goes in our head.
我们每个人脑子里都有这样负面的自我谈话录音带。
Guess what?
你想，
There's enough people that are telling us we can't do it.
已经有够多的人告诉我们”你做不到“，
That we're not good enough.
告诉我们”你不够好“
Why do we want to tell ourselves that?
为什么我们还要和自己说那些呢？
We know for a fact that thoughts influence actions.
我们知道思想是会影响行动的。
We saw it there with the video Sheldon, Dr. Levy showed.
我们从莱维博士的视频里已经看到了。
We know that our thoughts influence actions,
思想影响我们的行动，
why do we want to say that negative self-talk to ourselves?
为什么还要和自己说那些负面的话？
We need to get our own self-affirmations.
我们需要自我肯定。
Muhammad Ali, what was his self-affirmation?
拳王阿里，他怎样自我肯定？
I am the greatest!
”我是最伟大的！“
Who else is going to tell you?
别人还有谁会这么告诉你？
There need to be quiet moments in your bedroom,
我们需要这样安静的时刻，在卧室里，
quiet moments when you're brushing your teeth.
在刷牙的时候，
That we need to reaffirm:
这时候我们需要肯定自己：
"I am the captain of my ship and the master of my fate!"
”我是我自己这艘船的船长，我命运的主人！“
That is my affirmation.
这就是我的自我肯定。
I came from a school of one thousand people,
我来自一个只有1000人的学校，
I lived in a town of one thousand people for fifteen years;
我在一个只有1000人的小镇住了15年；
there's no reason that I should be in charge of an Athletics department,
没什么一定的理由要我来主管一个体育系，
building maple leaf gardens.
去负责建造体育场，
But I am the captain of my ship and the master of my fate.
但是我是船长，是我命运的主人。
If I don't say it, if I don't believe it,
如果我不和自己这么说，我自己都不相信，
no one else will.
就更不会有其他人相信了。
How do you build self-confidence?
你怎么建立自信？
Get away from the people who will tear you down.
远离那些打击你自信的人。
There's enough of that.
我们听到这样（打击人的话）够多了。
Muhammad Ali, I am the greatest! There is no one better than me.
记住拳王阿里：”我是最伟大的！“”没有人比我更好了“
There's a difference between hubris, and ego, and false pride.
狂妄，自大，和虚假的傲慢，这些是有区别的。
It's just reminding yourself in quiet silent moments,
我们要的只是在那些安静的时刻提醒自己，
I put it down on a list,
那些让我成为我的理由，
it's right beside my mirror,
把它们写下来，
right?
放在镜子边，
about all the things that make me who I am.
是吧？
Because I make enough mistakes,
因为（如果我不这么做的话，）我犯的错误够多了，
and the newspapers will recognize it,
报纸会发现这些错误
and people around me will recognize it;
我周围的人会看到这些错误
and they'll tear me down,
然后他们会打击我，
and pretty soon I'll begin to believe it.
然后过不了多久我就会相信这些打击人的话了。
There was a time when my confidence was really low.
有一段时间我非常没有自信。
There was a time when I took this job
那时我从爱荷华州过来
when I came from Iowa,
接受这份工作，
I don't know if I could do it.
我不知道能否胜任。
I had to bring out my self-confidence letter.
那时我拿出了我写给自己的信，它让我鼓起信心。
A letter I wrote to myself when I was feeling good.
这封信是我意气风发的时候写的。
Ivan, congratulations on getting your PhD before 40.
（信上这么写的）”伊凡，祝贺你在40岁之前拿到了博士学位。祝贺你,,.“
Congra...I am 40, under.
对了我还没到四十岁。
(Laughter)
(笑声）
Congratulations on winning a national championship.
“祝贺你赢得了全国冠军”
Good job on raising three good kids and marrying the right woman.
“祝贺你娶了一位好太太，养大了三个好孩子。”
I wrote a letter to myself,
我就这样给自己写了一封信
it was my own brag sheet.
它是我的“自夸”列表，
My own letter about the things I was proud of.
那上面有我为之骄傲的成就。
Because there are moments,
我们的职业、生活道路上，
and we'll all experience them in our career, in our lives,
求职，人际关系中，
in our job hunting, in our relationships;
总会有一些时刻
when we are not feeling good about
我们感觉不太好，
who, and what, and where we are.
不确定我们是谁，我们的身份，以及为什么会在这里。
And I had to bring out that letter and read it time and time again,
每到那个时候，我就拿出那封信
for a period of about two weeks, to weather me through that storm.
一遍遍地读，读大概两周，以帮助我度过舆论的风暴。
It was important.
这很重要。
Stop the self-talk, the negative self-talk.
停止那些自我否定。
If you watch you'll see some athletes that have a little bandage,
如果注意的话，你会发现有些运动员身上有个小创可贴
or a little brand around them.
或者小的商标牌在身上。
Lance Armstrong is a perfect one.
兰斯•阿姆斯特朗是个很好的例子。
What's his self-affirmation?
他的自我肯定是这样的：“强大的活着”。
Livestrong isn't a brand, it was to remind him of who he was.
这个并不是商标代言，这是用来提醒他“我是谁”的。
Live strong. Then it became a brand.
强大的活着。然后这个变成了他个人精神的代言。
He would move that from one arm to the next arm,
当疑虑和恐惧来袭，
when doubt and fear came into his mind.
他会把它在手上移来移去。
Live strong, put it on there, let's go.
强大的活着，把这句话记下来，然后冲锋陷阵。
We'll all have it, we place it.
我们都会有这样一句话的。
Two ways to build self-confidence.
以上是两种办法来建立自信。
I'm worried about my time
有点担心时间不够
I'm gonna tell you of one way
让我来告诉你一种
you can build self-confidence in others.
帮助别人建立自信的办法。
We are coaches and educators,
作为教练、教育工作者、老师，
we are teachers, we are people
我们是
who will create value in the world;
为这个世界创造价值的人；
and in doing that, we are critical by the nature of what we do.
因为这个工作，我们责任重大。
I am a coach, I want you to score a goal.
我是个教练，我希望你能进球。
The ball went over high. "Dang it!" The ball went high!
球踢高了。“该死！”球踢高了！
"Thank you coach, I know that. Feedback tells me that."
“谢谢你教练，我知道。我看到球踢飞了。”
So what do we do?
然后我们做什么？
I need you to put your elbow here,
我需要你把肘关节放在这里，
I need you to put your knee over the ball,
把膝盖这样放在球上，
I need you to follow through.
然后这样踢出去。
Boom. Land. Great.
砰。球进了。很好。
Notice, I never made it as a professional.
其实我自己作为足球运动员从来做不到。
(Laughter)
（笑声）
What can we do?
我们做什么呢？
We fix mistakes.
我们改正别人的错误。
When I'm fixing that mistake:
当我在改正那个错误时：
"Johnny, this is terrible,
"约翰，这太糟了，
you need to bend your knee, you need to do this, this."
你应该弯曲膝盖，你应该做这个，做那个。“
What have I done to Johnny's self-confidence?
我对约翰的自信心做了什么呢？
Bend your knee, then do this, then do this.
弯曲膝盖，然后做这个，做那个。
Next thing you know, Johnny's crushed.
然后，约翰的信心被打击了。
Ignore what Johnny does wrong
如果忽略约翰做错的地方
and find Bob or Sally or Freda over here.
而是转向另一边的鲍勃、萨莉或弗雷达，
Great goal Freda, I love how you kept your knee low,
”好球，弗雷达！你膝盖放低的动作很好，
you followed through, and you landed like this.
踢出去的动作和射门的动作也很好，
Great job!
干得好！”
Johnny: "Oh?"
约翰这时的反应会是：“哦？”
Great! Johnny's not demoralized.
太好了！约翰没有被打击士气。
His confidence isn't shot,
没有伤害他的自信，
and what I've done is, I've built up Freda's.
而且我还建立了弗雷达的自信。
Imagine how we could change the way we parented kids.
想象一下我们可以怎样改变我们为人父母的方式。
Instead of:
别这样做：
"get that glass off the counter, what's wrong with you?"
“把那杯子从吧台拿开，你出什么毛病了？”
(Laughter)
（笑声）
If we catch the mother, good.
如果我们看到母亲做了一件事，好。
Great job! Great job.
干得好！
Thank you Alice for taking your glass to the counter.
“谢谢你，爱丽丝，谢谢你把杯子拿到吧台。”
It sounds simple but we forget about it.
听起来很简单，但我们总忘记。
Or as educators, or as somebody as a team,
作为老师，作为一个团队
if we manage to praise
我们应该去赞扬
the positive behaviour that we wanted to reinforce.
那些我们想巩固的行为。
We forget it. It sounds so simple.
大家老忘记这点。听起来这么简单。
Catch them when they're good.
抓住那些好的表现。
We forget it. It's simple.
我们总忘记。这太简单了。
Here's what they did.
现在看看人们是怎么做的。
There was a study in Kansas that did this.
在堪萨斯有这样一个研究，
They did video, and we all do video.
和我们一样，他们拍下了训练的录像。
And we show the video of them doing the run of the play:
然后把录像给运动员看
"Um, this goal happened because the basket wasn't protected,
“呃，这个进球是因为没人保护球网，
we didn't rotate here, right?
你们在这里没有转身，对吧？
We needed to do this and then cover the slot."
你们应该这样做去保护这个区。”
And, if that's the baseline,
然后呢，如果这是原来的表现
improvement of the Kansas State team went like this.
堪萨斯州队毫无提高。
Then, they said they ignored all of that
然后，实验里人们选择忽略了这些错误
and they just showed them the times they did it right.
只是挑出对的时候，做得很好的时候
The times they did it perfect.
把这些录像给运动员看。
That presented no goals, spoke to the same points,
其他和原来一样
improvement went like that.
然后表现提高了一大截。
It changed and revolutionized the way we as coaches
这个实验完全改变了我们作为教练
interact with our student athletes.
该如何和学生运动员交流的方式。
We can apply that to the business world,
这个结果可以应用到商业，
we can apply that to our student group works,
应用到学生组织的工作，
we can apply that to our management teams.
应用到团队管理。
Easily: catch them when they are good.
很简单：抓住人们做得好的时刻。
Last and certainly not least.
最后再说一点，
My son is really good at this.
自信的人用自己的方式
Self-confident people interpret feedback
来理解别人的反馈。
the way they choose to.
我儿子对此非常擅长。
I ask my son who is by the far a terrible, terrible athlete,
我儿子是迄今为止最糟的运动员，
gets it from his dad.
从他爸爸那遗传的。
(Laughter)
（笑声）
The game's...
我问我儿子，“这比赛.."
How's the game?
“比赛怎么样？”
Oh great! I scored three goals, I got two assists.
“哦很好！我进了三个球，有两个助攻。”
I'm like: "I did not see him touch the puck!"
我心里想：”我压根没看到他碰到球！“
But he has his own perception
但是他对自己的表现
of how he did!
有自信的理解！
(Laughter)
（笑声）
I love it!
太爱他这自信了！
(Laughter)
（笑声）
Right? I'm the...I'm that guy!
对吧？”我就是那个人！“
I'm like: "I remember when I was taking
我记得当我第一次遇到我太太
when I met my wife, it was in the commons.
是在公共休息室
"Paulie, would you like to go to the movies?
”宝莉，要不要一起去看电影？“
Ladies? Tingly, tingly, tingle."
邀约女生啊，又激动又兴奋。
(Laughter)
（笑声）
And she goes: "Ah, no."
然后她回答：”啊不要。“
I asked her again.
然后我又邀请她了。
Cause I think that she just hasn't seen me in the right light.
因为我觉得第一次的时候我站那里的光线不对。
(Laughter)
（笑声）
Maybe, that's not the wrong shirt on.
或者，我穿的衬衫不对。
Right?
是吧？
Cause I'm interpreting that the way I want to interpret it.
我就是在按照我要的方式去理解这件事。
Finally I asked her out again.
最后我又去邀请她了。
She gave me this one comment, right? Or, she sent it to her friend.
她给我留了这样一句话
Cause that's the way you did it back then.
通过朋友留的，那个时候大家都这样做。
"She wouldn't date you unless
”宝莉不会和你约会的，除非
there was the last person on Earth,
你是全世界剩下的最后一个男人了，
hell was freezing over,
世界即将冰封，
there was a small chance we had to save the planet Earth.
而我们还有一丝机会去拯救地球。”
Some people, it's like, there's no chance.
对有些人来说，这就是没戏了。
I'm like: "You're saying there's a chance."
而对我来说，”你的意思是我还有一丝机会呢“。
(Laughter)
（笑声）
Right?
对吧。
Because that's how I'm gonna interpret it.
这就是我理解的方式。
If I could give you one thing to take from this,
从这个例子里我想让你知道
it is: no one will believe in you
没有人会相信你，
unless you do.
除非你自己先相信自己。
Listen to the words of that video,
听清楚，
here's to the crazy ones,
下面这句话我送给狂人，
the misfits, the rebels,
不合群的，反叛的，
the troublemakers,
老惹麻烦的，
the round pegs in the square holes.
与周围格格不入的人。
We're supposed to be different, folks.
我们生来就该与众不同。
And when people look at us,
当人们的目光投向你时，
believe in yourself.
相信你自己。
Thank you.
谢谢。
(Applause)
（掌声）
[内部视频链接]:
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