【剑15真题解析】收藏!《剑15》 Test 1 写作 部分详细解读!
账号已注销
2020年07月03日 15:32
收录于文集
共8篇

我们继续分析TEST 1的写作部分,口语部分​查看蓝字~

小作文

* 从小作文任务的角度而言,剑桥15的4个Test分别选用了柱图、线图、流程图、饼+表组合图。

* 意义有二:

一、弥补过往剑桥真题集中部分图形出现的太少,烤鸭缺乏学习和练笔的真题素材。

二、极大地提示了未来官考中小作文部分出题的宏观趋势:所有图形类型都要熟练,过往的备考套路(集中突破某一/几种图形)恐怕要凉。

柱状图是雅思小作文在2019年的偏爱

其实,阮恩老师一直在讲:看穿图形形式(柱子扎堆),看到图形的本质(比较数据之间的大小关系)。那么,比较数据之间的大小关系从来都是以下4点:

  • 内容(TA)考察点:找到数字的异同关系明显的地方(同时,舍弃不明显的地方)。

  • 结构(CC)考察点:描述异同关系的句子(分句或独立句子)之间如果连贯。

  • 词汇(LR)考察点:描述大小、程度等的形容词/副词/名词(以及表达数据之间的比较关系的介词)。

  • 语法(GRA)考察点:描述比较关系的语法(典型为比较级、同级比较、倍数或分数等)和句法(表达比较关系的状语形式)。

Test 1中的图形:信息量偏大,信息关系复杂。进入“凉凉”难度区。

破题的两个维度(任选其一作为写作思路):

  1. 根据小方框里的3种buying and drinking habits观察和拆分图中的数据。

  2. 根据主图坐标轴的横轴上的5个城市观察和拆分图中的数据。

按照第一个维度(3种buying and drinking habits)构思作文,示范如下:

Five of Australia’s cities are surveyed in terms of people’s buying and drinking coffee and tea during the recent 4-week time. ← 这里注意:这个信息没有再标题中出现,但是在主图下方的小方框里出现了。这个信息很重要,因为有了时间状语就规定了我们描述数据时所用的时态。The results, illustrated in bars, indicate some difference between the three habits. ← 红色部分提示读者(考官)我们的思路是“根据3种buying and drinking habits来展开写作”。这个提示很重要,因为有了对主体部分内容思路的提示,考官读的时候,会感觉思考压力不大,轻松舒服,给分就会慷慨。同时,注意一个细节:some difference这里,用的是difference的不可数意义,指笼统的泛泛的区别这样一个概念,而不是具体的区别或不同之处,所以没有复述s结尾。

Overall, people, wanting either of the drinks, were more likely to visit a caféthan were they to buy fresh or instant coffee, ← GRA:比较级 and in Sydney, Melbourne and Hobart, the preference was obvious, ← LR:描述程度的形容词represented by that more than 60 percent of people bought the drink from a café. In fact, ← CC:引导“进一步”的信息although Adelaide saw the exception to the overall situation, ← CC:让步状语从句表达了信息之间的关系 visiting a café was only one percent behind← LR:描述数据之间关系的介词 people’s first choice —buying instant coffee—and had a percentage approximating to 50.

同时,注意一个词汇点:实意代词的使用来精简表达。这一段出现了preference和choice,替代小方框里给出的具体的行为。

Buying fresh coffee draws attention for its particularly low← LR:描述程度的形容词popularity, ← LR:实意代词significantly lower ← LR:描述程度的形容词(比较级) than that of the other options, in Brisbane, Adelaide, and Hobart, where only← LR:描述程度的副词 fewer than 40 percent or even 35 percent of the city residents made this choice← LR:实意代词 during the past 4 weeks. The situation was better← LR:描述程度的形容词(比较级) in Sydney and Melbourne. Meanwhile, ← CC:引导“平行/并列”的信息 instant coffee, as people’s second choice, ← LR:实意代词 should not be missed, and its popularity parallels that of fresh coffee in some cities and that of café coffee in others.

【全文结束】

解答可能的疑惑:

1)问:没有conclusion?答:形式上没有,内容上在introduction的最后一句有对图形的overview,所以行文结构上没有conclusion了。

2)问:词汇简单?答:是的,但也不是的。本文的措辞重点不在形容词,这部分词汇做到准确即可。本文的用词的匠心在于:实意代词(比如:preference、choice、popularity)、表达比较关系的动词(parallel)和介词(behind)、一些小作文常中的通用词没有用最常见的词(represent)。

3)问:怎么GRA的得分点不明显?答:并没有(只是没有标注出来)。仔细看看主语的多样性;仔细看看状语和定语的多种形式和位置。

按照第二个维度(5个城市)构思作文,示范如下:

【本文无细节批注,可参考上一篇理解】

Five of Australia’s cities are surveyed in terms of people’s buying and drinking coffee and tea during the recent 4-week time. The results, illustrated in bars, indicate some diversity among the five cities.

Adelaide draws the immediate attention. ← 总分结构明显,便于读者(考官)阅读。“哄考官开心(从而)得高分”。→ (注意:即将出现高能句子。)The distinction, between this city and the others, lies not only in that a café was not so popular a destination as in the other four cities but also in that a café was not even the first choice of the city’s people. This is represented by the barely-50-percent figure. Also, Adelaide was one of the two cities—the other being Brisbane—that had the lowest percentage in buying fresh coffee.

In the other cities, there was a common situation. ← 总分结构明显,便于读者(考官)阅读。“哄考官开心(从而)得高分”。→ People, wanting either of the drinks, were more likely to visit a café than were they to buy fresh or instant coffee, and in Sydney, Melbourne and Hobart, the preference, in percentage terms, was exceeding 60 or approximating to 65. In fact, Sydney parallels Melbourne in terms of the order of people’s preference.

大作文

这个话题很有“中国特色”,为雅思的“向世界的东方看齐”点赞。“安居才能乐业”是中国人的老话,这个话题真的是应景。那么,如何才算安居?买房还是租房?90后(最大龄的都要30岁了吧)不买房?00后不买房?80后的阮恩(章跃)老师的想法是:

Renting a home, either on a long lease or on a flexible one, rather than buying one is one lifestyle choice. The opposite is the other. In those countries where people tend to own a property, the preference makes sense, and the ownership has profit.

* 句子有长有短,信息的节奏才让读者(考官)舒服。

题目中既然给出了两件事情(“买”和“租”),那就要充分回应题目给出的信息,需要讨论“租”,即使我赞同“买”。于是,让步的内容就有了。租的好处,在阮恩(章跃)老师看来有(但不限于)如下两点:

Doing the math, renting is probably less expensive whereas the down payment plus the ongoing mortgage, if one buys a home, is the bigger money. Renting also allows some freedom, since one can be mobile, finding a different home—a bigger one, a cheaper one, a transport-convenient one, a downtown apartment that has everything in its vicinity or a quiet suburban house that gives the person solitude as his needs may change.

* 句子的长和短的变化使得信息的节奏好。节奏好,带着读者(考官)跑,分数就好。

* 3分钟学会一个7分句(可能不止7分):Renting also allows some freedom, since one can be mobile, finding a different home—a bigger one, a cheaper one, a transport-convenient one, a downtown apartment that has everything in its vicinity or a quiet suburban house that gives the person solitude as his needs may change. 解析:主句 + 原因状语从句(since引导) + 状语从句内再下一层到伴随状语(动词分词引导),以及伴随状语中动作的状语(as引导)。

但是,“买”明显更好:

However, does the idea that paying a rent, even a small sum of it, is paying for the landlord’s mortgage ever come across our mind? Many people certainly believe that renting feels like getting ripped off, and they want the ownership. Further, if they buy a home at a good price and it is on a good location, the money paid can be turned to a successful investment. They may sell the property at a higher price one day and make good use of the margin, either to buy a better home that may be more expensive or to settle at a passable place and enjoy life’s other offerings with the extra money. In addition, one will eventually need a permanent residence as he or she reaches a certain point of life—having a marriage or a family—when that “I can be mobile” is no longer a proper lifestyle. People, with this culture embedded in mind, make home-buying plans, and an owned home provides the sense of security.

注意:有没有发现买的理由同时也是买的好处?那就理由和好处一并讨论了,不要傻乎乎的拆分开来说。

* 3分钟学会一个7分句:They may sell the property at a higher price one day and make good use of the margin, either to buy a better home that may be more expensive or to settle at a passable place and enjoy life’s other offerings with the extra money. 解析:动词不定式作为伴随状语。

* 3分钟学会一个7分句(可能不止7分):In addition, one will eventually need a permanent residence as he or she reaches a certain point of life—having a marriage or a family—when that “I can be mobile” is no longer a proper lifestyle. 解析:主句 + as引导的状语从句(从句中又有when引导的定语从句修饰a certain point of life,同时,when引导的从句内部是一个主语从句构成的“主-系-表”结构)。

It is therefore reasonable that some people prefer a title certificate to a lease. Admittedly, this is not to deny that renting a home may be a good deal for the 90’s and 00’s generations and those who stay young.

买吧,买吧,先定一个小目标嘛。

更多关于《剑15》的内容,也可关注新航道雅思9分达人微博~